Trainers to Big Kid Undies

A few months ago, I had a dream. Nathan, my husband, and I were standing in the lobby of a big building, glass windows all around. Nathan was holding our youngest son and talking to someone. There were women ushering all of these children into the adjacent building.

One of the women came up to Nathan and took Cohen from his arms. They were the last ones that went into the other building.

As the door was closing, the woman looked up and smiled at me, but I knew something was wrong. I felt sick. I ran towards the building, but just before I reached the door, the building blew up.

I woke up covered in sweat and almost threw up. It still has that effect. I can still see it so vividly. The past few weeks that dream keeps coming back to me. I’ve been turning it around in my head.

The other day something came to me. In the dream, Nathan and the other person were oblivious to what was happening. He simply handed our child to the woman. I thought to myself, “God, is this a reflection of today’s parents? Have we become so distracted, busy, complacent, and apathetic we simply “hand our kids right into the arms of evil, unaware?”

Then he brought something else to my attention. I was there watching it all take place, but I just stood there! I only took action after it was too late!

The Bible is full of action words, Pray, Seek, Take Up, Guard, Go… I wonder how many of us are standing on the sidelines when he’s calling us to action. Friends, parenting is hard, but now, more than ever, we need to rise up and be intentional in our parenting.

Maybe my dream was a result of too much pizza the night before, but regardless, I do believe if we’re listening, the Holy Spirit will speak to us through the details of our daily lives, and I've learned to listen when he does.

The word NO is like a four-letter word in our house! The reaction it evokes in my children is shocking at times. I’ve stood back and thought, “WHAT is going on!?”

About two years ago when our home was in complete upheaval God brought me to 2 Timothy 3, “But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, loving of pleasure rather than lovers of God- “

As I read this I thought, “kind of looks like my family!” I’ve always been quick to condemn and blame myself for my kids’ behavior, but while reading this, I clearly heard, “This is spiritual!”

We by far are NOT perfect parents! More days than not do I go to bed feeling like I failed, but then I’m reminded, we’re in a spiritual battle, and I ask myself, “What are you going to do about it!”

As one of my children was going off the deep end this weekend, I heard, “You fight the battles to win the war!” I’m not going to lie; in our kids' younger years we weren’t as good at fighting the battles. We caved and took the easy road far too often, and we’re reaping what we sowed. The battles are that much harder now. There are days I question, "Is this even worth it?” I’m utterly exhausted from the fight!

We have strong willed kids, VERY strong-willed kids. My kids can go hours fighting for their “cause”. Yes, hours! If it’s any indication, my mom recommended The Strong-Willed Child by Dr. James Dobson to us when our kids were just toddlers.

I’ve read that strong-willed children become leaders, but this weekend as I was muttering to myself, “I’m raising leaders! I’m raising leaders!” I felt pressed upon my spirit, “No, you’re raising warriors!”

We’re raising warriors, friends! Warriors are bold, strong, and courageous. They are the first to ride into battle, and they don’t back down to a fight. They change the world! That’s why our enemy is fighting us so hard.

There has been a shift from my generation to my kid’s. The battles we fight as parents aren’t the same ones our parents fought. It’s hard, but Esther 4:14 says, we were created for such a time as this.

He has a plan and purpose for our lives, and our kids, but to fulfill it, it’s going to take blood, sweat, and tears. War is brutal! It takes determination, brass, and grit to stand no matter how hard it gets and keep fighting the good fight. Don’t give up friends! You’ve got this!

There will be days when you limp back from the battlefield, I feel like my husband has had to drag me back on more than one occasion, but even then, we are NOT alone.

He’s with you and he’s given you everything you need. Pick up your SWORD (the Bible). It’s the only weapon he gave us in the armor of God. I think that exemplifies its power. Read it and use it to fight for your family and kids.

“Yes, I’m raising my children to be kind. But I’m raising them to put on the full armor of God and go to war. Because there’s a heavenly battle raging on, and I want them strong and courageous and to know Who they’re fighting for.” Angela Mitchell @raisingapologists

“Train up a child in the way they should go, and when they are old, they will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6

“Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.” Proverbs 13:24

“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Ephesians 6:4