Love Your Bag

We’ve been reading Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Meyer in our Women’s Ministry. In chapter 13, she addresses a judgmental and critical mind. She shares a story from when she was pregnant with her fourth child. She became debilitatingly sick. She didn’t have morning sickness with any of her other pregnancies, and no matter how much she prayed she couldn’t find relief.

Then one day God reminded her of a time when she had judged a young mom attending her bible study who was struggling with morning sickness. Joyce had formed the opinion that, “she was a weakling and was using her pregnancy as an excuse to be lazy and self-indulgent.” She was reaping what she had sown in judgement. She repented and asked for forgiveness, and the sickness left and never came back.

After reading this I was like, “WOW!” A few days later God gave me my own epiphany. I have my bachelor’s degree in education and most of my early work experience was working with children. As a young 20 something, I’m now realizing, I was a bit arrogant and prideful. I remember thinking and telling my husband, “We’re never going to have kids like that! We’re never going to be those parents! The 3 second rule…ha.”

Our tongue is a powerful two-edged sword, and I can tell you I’ve eaten every one of those judgements and words. We have struggled with parenting. Many nights I’ve gone to bed feeling like a complete failure.

It’s so easy for us to look at someone else’s life, pick it apart, and offer our opinion, but that’s not our job. My husband has turned to me before and said, “must be nice to be perfect!” OUCH! In those moments the flesh wants to snap back with a snide remark, but in most cases he’s right. I’m coming from a place of judgment, not love. Too often, I’ve had to take myself off the throne and put God back up there!

A few years ago, a found this quote by Hannah Brencher, “We all have a bag. We all pack differently. Some of us are traveling light. Some of us are secret hoarders who’ve never parted with a memory in our lives. I think we are all called to figure out how to carry our bag to the best of our ability, how to unpack it, and how to face the mess. I think part of growing up is learning how to sit down on the floor with all your things and figuring out what to take with you and what to leave behind.”

We never truly know what someone else is carrying. Life is hard! We all have our issues and bad days, but when we can step back and realize a behavior or attitude many times has nothing to do with us, it opens our heart to compassion and grace. Our pastor said something that struck me. He said, “when the sin of your friend breaks your heart for them, then you’re ready to talk to them.”

Life and death, blessing and cursing, comes from the tongue. Our mouths control our life. James 3. We have the choice what we speak into and over our lives and others’, and as my mama always told us, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”

Romans 2:1 “You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgement on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.”

Matthew 7:1-2 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, “Let me take the speck out of your eye, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Galatians 6:7 “A man reaps what he sows.”